As a family, we are trying to live our lives in a way that brings God's love to others. We fail time and time again, but we are so grateful for the grace and mercy of God granted to us through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Hospital Stay - Week 1
I know I've been absent from the blog for a while. The sad thing is that I actually have had a few posts written and just waiting to be added for quite some time, but I hadn't gotten around to adding the pictures that I wanted to add to them, so I never actually put them on the blog. Maybe I'll have a little more time to try to get caught up as I am now on bedrest in the hospital indefinitely. I have been here for a week now though, and haven't been able to do much of anything, so I'm not making promises. It's not easy to do much when you feel miserable and are not even allowed to sit up in bed. I usually try to be upbeat and have a good attitude about things, and I'm trying to do that now, but I can honestly say that I truly hate this place. Let me back up...
Last Monday evening, I was just going about normal activities when I started to bleed heavily. (I think I mentioned in my last post that I have something called placenta previa, and this is one of the complications that it can lead to.) Jay wasn't home and I didn't want to alarm the kids so I tried to calmly get things under control. I called my friend, Katie, to drive me to the hospital, and called my neighbor and my parents to get the kids taken care of. I didn't tell Jake and Addi what was going on, but Jake definitely knew something was up and was concerned. Jay was up at Biola and I called him and told him to meet me at the hospital.
To make a long story short, I was admitted into the hospital and have been here ever since. It has been physically and emotionally draining. I can't stand the thought of not being home to take care of my kids and I worry the most about Tate. He is so little and he needs me. I was still nursing him up until having to be here, and the poor little guy just had to be weaned cold turkey. I worry constantly about what this is going to do to the bond that I have with him. I am so fortunate to have so many people in our lives who are praying for us and helping to take care of us. And I can't begin to describe how amazing Jay has been through all of this. I know that he has the weight of the world on his shoulders, but he doesn't let on for a second. I can't believe how he is just dealing with everything. It doesn't change the fact that I worry about my kids all the time though.
The first few days here were pure hell. They put me on something called magnesium sulfate to try to stop the bleeding and contractions, and basically, it made it so that I was just sick and couldn't function at all. I could hardly talk, much less move. I had another big bleeding episode on Tuesday, and the doctors got me prepped for an emergency c-section (I was 28 weeks along at the time, now 29). By God's grace, that didn't happen, but they then upped the dose of the magnesium, making it even worse. Once the bleeding was under control for a couple of days, they took me off of that and that has made all the difference in the world...not that it has made things pleasant. At least I am able to function though. I have such a hard time with doctors/hospitals, etc. because, often times, all of their interventions just lead to different complications. The catheter that they had in me lead to a bladder infection, which lead to a kidney infection, high fever, major back pain, antibiotics, etc. And I have no doubt that the medications they are pumping me full of will lead to other complications as well. I realize that it is important to be here in the case of another emergency, but I truly believe that the longer I stay, the more unhealthy I become.
All that said though, I did witness God's protection and truly believe He was at work here. I am going to post that story next...
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